When I was a single chick, I was on a dating site. Like, who isn’t these days? While I have friends who find the whole concept difficult, the fact remains that we live in a time that makes it difficult to meet potential matches organically.
If you are in your late 30’s or beyond (I’m mid 40’s), it becomes an even narrower field. Night clubs are packed with much younger people, and if you are into younger guys, you might strike it rich.
I chose to be on RSVP and all in all, while initially I had some terrible experiences, for the most part it was ok. I met people I never would have met in my daily life. I met the Producer via RSVP. Had it not been for his profile that stood out on that dating site, I doubt I would have met him in the real world. There was a huge amount of luck involved too. There are so many dating sites and some people are on many.
I had a very short lived experience with another site also but went off it when I was inundated with offers of sex. Did you want to know my band first?!
Recently I was having dinner with some lovely people and one of the gorgeous writer chicks, who happened to be single, told me her dating app of choice was Tinder.
Oh how my eyes lit up! I was dying to have a look at how it works given that I have several friends who’ve been on it!
If you’re not aware, Tinder has a reputation (rightly or not) for being a quick hook up for sex site. It works on proximity and sends you potential matches who live close enough to you that you might go out together.
When she handed me the phone and told me up go for it, what instantly becomes apparent is that Tinder works on the premise of instant attraction.
When a photo of a potential match pops up, you swipe right for a “yes” and left for a “no “. Some photos are accompanied by a limited profile, but a lot are not! Like they didn’t really bother to add a profile.
For some it’s irrelevant if you like Pina coladas or getting caught in the rain…it’s more like “you’re cute, want to hook up?” I’m sure that is not true for all!
The Producer and I were having way too much fun swiping left and right – but mostly left giving the ridiculous amount of photos men put up with their dogs, or a group of mates (which one are you?), photos sans tops (ugh) or worse, photos where they have badly attempted to crop out a woman (probably an ex).
Seriously guys! If you are that lazy about Setting up a Tinder profile, you are not looking like a hot prospect!
There are approximately 50 million Tinder users world wide which is staggering. In our fast food, instant gratification society it seems to have touched a nerve with Gen Y’s…but also for people beyond their 30’s.
Being a feminist, I need to add that there’s been much controversy regarding the founders of Tinder, arguably the biggest hook up app ever invented, about a culture of misogyny.
Whitney Wolfe – a former head of marketing at Tinder – sued the company for sexual harassment and discrimination and logged a formal court complain that alleged she was actually a co-founder of Tinder and stripped of all credit by the two Silicon Valley uber dudes (Sean Rad and Justin Mateen) who have claimed it as their own. Mateen was suspended from the actually owners if the app – parent company IAC – pending investigations.
Wolfe’s claims led to further complaints that the Tinder working culture was geared towards men – that it was more like a uni fear party than a professional work environment. Surprising? Sadly no when you look at the app which is quite blatantly encouraging you to make choices solely on someone’s physical looks. These are two men who proudly posted on their Facebook pages that Urban Dictionary had coined the term “tinder sluts” to describe women who sleep with men they meet on Tinder.
Bah!! Give me strength!
Of course there are pros and cons (and no one is forcing you to join any dating sites, right?). I for one think why not if you are single and looking for some not too serious romance! There are so many smart phone dating app choices out there – why not give it a try?
The lovely writer chick who graciously let me make potential date selections has met a couple if interesting people through Tinder. As a single person, you can put yourself out there, or go out a lot and get social, or choose to stay single. All good choices depending on where you are at.
There’s no denying it’s quick and easy – just swipe left or right. You have lots of choices which is a bonus! I think if you’re ready for something more serious and you really are seeking a potential relationship, this may not be the answer to all your dreams!
But in the meantime, while there’s plenty to swipe left on, there may just be friends to be made – or at least some decent eye candy!